A good sexual life is not just about what happens in the bedroom. It starts with your overall health, how you care for your body, how you communicate, and how you protect yourself and your partner. If you are asking how to have a good sexual health, you are really asking how to support your physical, emotional, and relational well-being.
Below, you will find practical steps you can start using right away, along with research-backed context so you understand why they matter.
Understand what good sexual health means
Good sexual health is more than “no problems.” It usually includes:
- A body that is healthy enough to enjoy sex without pain or major limitations
- Protection from infections, unintended pregnancy, and long-term complications
- A sense of comfort with your own sexuality and preferences
- Relationships where consent, respect, and communication are standard
- Access to care and screenings when something feels off
Sexual health is part of your overall wellness. When you take care of your heart, hormones, mental health, and relationships, you are also taking care of your sexual life.
Protect yourself from STIs
Sexually transmitted infections are very common, and many do not cause noticeable symptoms at first. The CDC notes that STIs can be spread through vaginal, anal, or oral sex, or through genital skin-to-skin contact, often without either partner realizing it (CDC). Knowing your status and taking preventive steps are central to good sexual health.
Get tested regularly
You cannot tell who has an STI by looking. Many infections stay silent for months or years. The CDC and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists stress that testing is the only way to know for sure and that many STIs are preventable, easy to diagnose, and treatable when detected early (CDC, ACOG).
You may want to talk with your healthcare provider about testing if:
- You are starting a new sexual relationship
- You or your partner have other partners
- You have had unprotected sex
- You notice new symptoms like discharge, burning when you pee, sores, or pelvic pain
If you test positive, most bacterial STIs like chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis can be cured with antibiotics. Viral infections like HPV, herpes, or HIV cannot be cured, but they can be treated to reduce symptoms and lower the chance of passing them on (ACOG).
Use protection consistently
Condoms and other barrier methods are practical tools, not a sign of mistrust. Johns Hopkins Medicine recommends using a condom during every sexual encounter to reduce exposure to organisms that cause STIs (Johns Hopkins Medicine).
For better protection:
- Choose latex or polyurethane male condoms or polyurethane female condoms
- Use them correctly from start to finish, not partway through sex
- For oral sex, use condoms on a penis to lower infection risk (Johns Hopkins Medicine)
Spermicides that contain nonoxynol 9 can kill HIV in a lab dish, but they have not been shown to protect against HIV in real life and may even increase risk. The CDC recommends relying on condoms with or without spermicide instead (Johns Hopkins Medicine).
Consider vaccination when eligible
Some infections are preventable with vaccines. HPV vaccination, ideally given at ages 11 or 12 but available up to age 45, can dramatically reduce the risk of cancers and genital warts linked to HPV infection (ACOG).
Ask your provider if HPV or other vaccines are right for you based on your age and health history.
Build daily habits that support sexual function
Your everyday lifestyle has a direct effect on your desire, arousal, and ability to enjoy sex. Good sexual health depends heavily on your blood flow, hormone balance, and nervous system, all of which respond to how you eat, move, and manage stress.
Move your body regularly
Healthy circulation is essential for sexual function. In men, a firm erection requires blood vessels that can widen effectively. Nitric oxide, a molecule your body produces, helps blood vessels relax so more blood can flow into the penis (University of Iowa Health Care). Similar blood flow benefits matter for women as well.
Research has shown that:
- Consistent aerobic exercise improves erectile function by improving cardiovascular health and lowering risk factors like obesity and high blood pressure (PMC)
- A simple home-based walking program led to a 71% decrease in erectile dysfunction after just 30 days in one randomized trial (PMC)
- Women who engage in up to six hours of weekly physical activity report less sexual distress and better blood flow to the clitoral area (PMC)
You do not need a perfect gym plan to see results. Start with:
- Brisk walking most days of the week
- Light strength training a few times a week
- Pelvic floor exercises (Kegels) to support erections and orgasm control for people of all genders (University of Iowa Health Care)
Eat in a way that protects blood vessels
What you eat affects nitric oxide production and inflammation, both of which influence sexual function. The University of Iowa Health Care notes that excess body weight increases inflammation and reactive oxygen species, which reduce how well nitric oxide works. Healthy eating and weight loss can reduce these effects and restore healthier blood vessel function (University of Iowa Health Care).
Try to:
- Base your meals around vegetables, fruits, whole grains, beans, nuts, and lean proteins
- Limit highly processed foods and sugary drinks, which can spike blood sugar and increase oxidative stress
- Keep alcohol moderate if you drink at all, since heavy drinking can reduce desire and performance
If you have diabetes or prediabetes, paying attention to blood sugar control is especially important, since high blood sugar can damage blood vessels and impair nitric oxide (University of Iowa Health Care).
Manage stress and mental load
Chronic stress does not stay in your head. It changes hormones and blood flow in ways that can blunt desire and interfere with arousal. High stress levels can narrow blood vessels, lower the effectiveness of erectile dysfunction medications, and reduce libido (University of Iowa Health Care, Obsidian Men’s Health).
You might not be able to remove stress entirely, but you can:
- Build short daily breaks for deep breathing or meditation
- Move your body to release tension and improve mood
- Talk with a therapist if anxiety, depression, or past experiences are affecting your sexual life
When you feel calmer and more connected to your body, it is easier to experience desire and pleasure.
Sexual health improves when your basic wellness is supported. Sleep, nutrition, movement, and stress care are often the quiet foundations of a satisfying sex life.
Practice simple sex hygiene
Good sex hygiene protects you and your partner from infections, irritation, and discomfort. It is less about harsh cleaning and more about gentle, consistent care.
Pro-Health Urgent Care notes that sex hygiene is an important part of physical, emotional, and social well-being (Pro-Health Urgent Care).
You can support your sexual health with steps like:
- Gently washing your genitals with mild soap and water or cleansing wipes before and after sex, which can help prevent yeast infections and UTIs
- Urinating before and after sex to help flush germs from the urethra and lower UTI risk (Pro-Health Urgent Care)
- Drinking plenty of water so your body stays hydrated, which supports natural moisture and further reduces UTI risk (Pro-Health Urgent Care)
One important note for women: both Pro-Health and Johns Hopkins Medicine caution against douching. It does not prevent STIs and can actually increase infection risk by disrupting the natural vaginal environment or pushing infections higher into the reproductive tract (Pro-Health Urgent Care, Johns Hopkins Medicine).
Communicate openly with partners
Your sexual health depends heavily on the quality of your communication. This includes talking about protection, STI status, boundaries, preferences, and how you both feel about your sex life.
The CDC encourages using the “Five P’s” framework when discussing sexual health: partners, practices, protection from STIs, past history of STIs, and pregnancy intentions (CDC). You can adapt this idea in your own conversations by:
- Sharing and asking about current partners and expectations of monogamy
- Discussing what types of sexual activities you are both comfortable with
- Talking about condom use and other protection before sex begins
- Being honest about any past or current STIs and testing history
- Clarifying whether pregnancy is something either of you wants to avoid or consider
For many women, emotional connection, trust, and feeling understood are deeply tied to desire and satisfaction, especially after age 40 or menopause (Mayo Clinic). Open conversations about what feels good, what does not, and what you both might want to try can make sex more fulfilling.
If you notice mismatched desire or ongoing frustration, try talking about it early. The Mayo Clinic notes that differences in desire are common and that conversations can reduce feelings of isolation or resentment (Mayo Clinic).
Keep up with sexual and reproductive screenings
Good sexual health also means catching problems early, not just reacting when something hurts. Regular screenings help detect infections, cancers, and other conditions when they are most treatable.
Recommended checks to discuss with your provider
Dr. Sheldon Riklon highlights that sexual and reproductive health screenings can catch STIs, cervical cancer, breast issues, and fertility problems early, which leads to better outcomes (UAMS News).
Depending on your age, sex, and medical history, your provider might recommend:
- Pap smears starting at age 21, every three years if results are normal
- From age 30, a Pap plus HPV test every five years if results remain normal (UAMS News)
- Regular STI testing if you are sexually active, especially if you have multiple partners or past infections (UAMS News, CDC)
- Pelvic exams or breast exams on a schedule tailored to your age and risk factors
Pregnant people also need ongoing screening through pregnancy to monitor for STIs, gestational diabetes, and other conditions that can affect both parent and baby (UAMS News).
If fear, embarrassment, or past experiences make you hesitate, you can tell your provider that. Many clinicians are trained to create a welcoming environment by asking about your name, pronouns, sexual orientation, and gender identity and by working at your pace (CDC).
Know when to seek extra help
Even with healthy habits, you might still face challenges such as:
- Pain during sex
- Trouble getting or maintaining an erection
- Low desire that bothers you or your partner
- Difficulty reaching orgasm
- Vaginal dryness or other menopause-related symptoms
Women who have persistent sexual difficulties or symptoms like dryness should see a doctor or sex therapist. Treatments like lubricants, pelvic floor therapy, hormone options, or changes in medication can help, and your doctor can also review whether any current medications might be affecting libido (Mayo Clinic).
For men, lifestyle changes around diet and exercise can be powerful tools, and professional guidance can help tailor them to your health, goals, and any existing conditions (Obsidian Men’s Health).
You do not have to “just live with it” if something is off. Sexual difficulties are common, and addressing them is part of taking your health seriously.
Putting it all together
If you want to know how to have a good sexual health, you can start with a few manageable steps:
- Schedule STI testing if it has been a while
- Add a short daily walk or gentle workout
- Use condoms or other barriers consistently with new or multiple partners
- Practice simple hygiene, like washing and peeing before and after sex
- Have one honest conversation with your partner about desires, boundaries, or concerns
- Ask your healthcare provider which screenings you are due for
Pick one or two of these to focus on this week. Small, steady changes in how you care for your body and communicate about sex can make a real difference in your comfort, confidence, and long-term sexual health.
